Parenthood 101
November 13, 2008 10:31 AM
The fact that parenthood is a 24/7 job shouldn't come as a surprise to all of you who are parents, but still, the reality of this concept bears repeating, because we don't always believe it. We think it might be completed one day. But no. Parenthood is a 24/7 job.
Being a parent can be rewarding, thrilling, even life-altering, but it can also be demanding and tough. It requires you to keep many plates spinning at the same time without allowing one to topple over and break. Problem is, the art of spinning plates - even to circus specialists, takes years of practice to master. What if you've just entered into parenthood for the first time?! Need some advice? Do your due-diligence; get prepared in advance. And then, throughout your life as a parent, plan to increase your knowledge and enhance your abilities by taking extra-credit courses along the way. But in the meantime, consider the following:
1. Keep your romance alive -I know, you're very focused on the baby, child, or children in your life, but trust me -- you and your adult partner need "special" time too.
2. Don't over-do it -In other words, resist over-scheduling your kids with too many activities, because this means more car-pool time for you. Kids benefit greatly from exploring the world using their own little imaginations. If we over-schedule, and over regulate them, they may not have enough of the leisure time they need to ponder their own bellybuttons - to dream, to gaze at passing clouds, to look for bugs in the grass. Kid stuff.
3. Make playdates with your girlfriends -Very important.
4. Teamwork -Get the kids to help you with the household chores. It'll be good for them to accomplish tasks, and while they help you, they're learning responsibility.
5. Learn to say no -Sometimes no is the perfect answer. Saying "no" helps kids to learn their boundaries, and also lays the groundwork for them to accept things are they are. Clearly in life, they won't always get their way. They'll need to learn to follow rules and understand that they shouldn't always expect more.
6. Be realistic -How many games of "go fish" can you play in one day? Set your limits. Participate, for sure, because every child wants mommy and daddy to play with them. But let them know you have adult things to do as well. Give them an opportunity to explore, and to use their own imagination. If we do everything with them, our kids will be fearful of trying anything alone, and that is not the message you want to send.
7. Breathe and smile -Life is a work in progress!
